Therapy vs Advice

8/10/08 -
Have you ever heard that old light bulb joke?

Q: "How many therapists does it take to change a light bulb?" A: Only one, but the light bulb has to really want to change".

The answer to that joke is a true statement about therapy. People have to really want to change in order for therapy to be successful. And, usually change takes awhile.

When I was in graduate school, they wanted to teach us how long it takes to change. So, we were instructed to learn to tie our shoelaces the opposite way from how we were used to tying them. (This, of course, was back in the day when shoes HAD laces and people DID tie them). It took me about six weeks to tie my shoelaces differently.

If something as simple as shoe laces takes six weeks, think how long it takes for us to change a maladaptive behavior we've had for years. So, with therapy, you have to be willing to work, to change and for it to take time.

I'm not sure that's necessarily true with advice giving. You have a problem and we talk about it. I give you some advice and you either take it or you don't. If you decide to follow my advice, there's a good chance that either all or part of your situation will change and it might not take so long.

Try asking for advice. It might just make a difference in your life.

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